My Doula Said What?! "Bathrooms Make Great Labour Caves"

As a doula, one of the best things I can do to support your labour is create a birthing space that feels safe, private and unobserved.

Why does it matter? Because when you feel safe, private, and unobserved, your labour may be less painful, happen more quickly, and result in fewer complications for you and your baby (want to learn more about this? Check out Dr. Sarah Buckley's work on physiological birth).

Blah blah surrender blah blah blah

Do you ever get tired of hearing about surrender? Yay, me too.

The reason birth workers go on about it so much though, is because surrender is often a necessary part of birth and parenting – sometimes it’s surrendering to the power of the surges running through your body, or surrendering to the need for unwished for medical interventions, or surrendering to the sleep deprivation and high needs of your newborn in the early weeks of postpartum.

10+ Tips for a Smooth Home Water Birth

Planning a home water birth? Here are 10+ practical tips to create a smooth home water birth experience:

  1. Talk to your care provider about their experience and comfort with water birth

    How often do they attend water births? How often do their clients who plan water birth actually have water births? When and why might they ask you to get out of the tub?

When Should I Hire A Doula?

You may have known you were going to hire a doula before you even got pregnant or you may not have learned about doulas until your 8th month of pregnancy.

Either way, it’s a good time to hire a doula!

If you’re nearing the end of your pregnancy, you may be worried it’s too late to hire a birth doula but as long as your little one is still inside your uterus, it’s not.

(Once, I was hired by somebody already IN labour so really, if you’re still pregnant, you’re ahead of the curve! 😉)

Considering Home

“Stepping out your front door is the first intervention in birth.” ~ Unknown

I imagine that folks may have strong reactions to that statement. Perhaps it feels confronting, or perhaps it feels obvious.

How it feels to you will depend a lot on the stories you’ve heard about birth your whole life.

The stories your parents told, your grandparents told, the stories you saw on tv or in movies, the stories your friends have told, what you’ve read on the internet or heard in podcasts, and the stories your maternity care provider has taken in and in return shares with you. All of these stories combine to create the story you personally believe about birth – about what makes it safe, or not safe, about what makes a birth “good” or “bad”.

Risk Doesn't Have To Be a Four Letter Word

We’re a risk averse culture.

The Oxford dictionary defines risk averse as "not willing to do something if it is possible that something bad could happen as a result". I mean *waves vaguely at the universe* that would include everything, really.

Many of us make decisions in this way - we consider the worst possible outcome and try to make choices to avoid that outcome. Which makes sense.

But it also traps us in a hyper-vigilant, fear-full place, expending all of our energy trying to maintain the illusion of control, dodging potential unwanted outcomes, and never working towards or considering those things we do want. Frankly, it’s exhausting.

Asking for help? So. Damn. Hard.

Why is asking for help so. damn. hard?!

Our culture values independence. In fact, we value it so highly that we’d often rather be miserable, exhausted, overwhelmed, and independent then thriving, joyful, rested, and interdependent.

Here’s the secret though – it doesn’t have to be that way. The only reason it IS that way is because we’ve all agreed to it. So if enough of us decided another way is better, then THAT would be the way.

2020: Year In Review

I usually do a year end wrap up in January but this year I’m not feeling it. Taking a look back at our stats feels a bit like trying to put a big ol’ shine on a smelly turd. I’m not a big fan of positivity for positivity’s sake.

I did want to share two things that capture some of what I’m feeling about 2020 though.