From Your Close Friend, The Doula

Congratulations! You're pregnant.

We're good friends. I love you dearly and I consider you one of the closest people in my life. I'm over the moon for you and your partner. I seriously love you guys.

Here's where it can get sticky.

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I'm a doula, but I may not be YOUR doula.

You've heard me describe how much I love my work and the passion I have for working with expectant families. You know what I do, how much I love it, and now you may be feeling an unspoken pressure to hire me.

Here is what I have learned in my years of experience - when families choose a doula, they choose the person who is exactly the right fit for this incredibly special time in their lives. And that may not be me.

I am not the doula for everyone. Just because we are close AND I do this work does not mean I am the best fit for you guys. Most importantly, I know this truth in my bones and would not be hurt if you were to choose someone else to support you during your transition into parenthood. I promise, I will not take it personally.

You deserve to have the exact support that you want and need.

However it looks, I want to see you and your partner supported and nurtured as you welcome your new baby.  My heart is overflowing for you both and I want this to be such a wonderful transition into parenthood for you.

If you want a doula but don't know where to start, I am happy to point you in the right direction. If you don't want a doula, that's fine too. I am here for you, whenever and however you need me. 

You've got this.

I support what YOU want. That is the foundational tenant of doula work.

You, as expectant parents, have an internal knowing about the way you'd like to be supported during this time. I respect and honour that knowing. I do not know better than you what you need.

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PS If you WANT me to be your doula...

I would be delighted to support you. This time is about you, your partner, and your journey into parenthood. If you choose to invite me to be a part of that journey, I would love nothing more than to be there for you, in my professional capacity.

Pregnancy is a time of preparation, of figuring out what you want to do and how you want to do it, both for birth AND for parenting. The bottom line? It's about you, not me.

I will support you. However that looks.


Did you hire a friend as a doula? Or did you prefer having a support person with a little more distance?

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Christine is a DONA International Certified Birth Doula who brings a sense of joy, excitement, and wonder to her work. She loves to support her clients as they journey towards their own best birth and shares their pride in their accomplishments. Offering deeply intuitive care, she is able to encourage them as they uncover their own inner hopes and desires for their birth, while supporting them with the tools to achieve them.